In Search of What Matters
a self-reflection
We just had Eid Mubarak last week, it fueled with everything from meeting families, eating cookies & rendang, and facing generic questions about life.
The last part is interesting, as I just realized how annoying it is and we kept that for quite long, making it as a normal.
annoying is the normal
Things like “When will you marry?” if the people have married then come again “When will you have a child?”
“When will you graduate? you’ve spent 4 years already” then if the people have graduated “Where will you work? Why not try to apply for a scholarship? My son got the scholarship, you should try”
“Oh you work at xxx, my friend’s son works on the yyy and earn XX mio rupiah a month, How about you?”
These questions mostly come from older family members, who have gone years of life experience ahead. Try to reshare what they have gone through, but the way isn't pleasant.
For them, what matters is following life tracks such as study hard, go to a good school, graduated on time, work in good company, marry, have kids, buy house … the list goes on. Anyone who goes off the rail seen as not normal.
Sometimes I also got to that trap ☹
Live life under the order, and instruction of people except yourself.
Okay, so what do you think matters?
After Eid Mubarak, Series of catchup with friends, hours of reading book, and leaving Instagram for the last 6 months bring me a self-reflection on what actually matters. Here are the list
- Love yourself first, then you can get others for you. Appreciate what makes the best version of you. Don’t waste time feeling sorry about yourself, or we call it self-pity.
- Be present, we spent lots of time interrupted and not present. Being present mean you give your 100% in whatever it’s with you, be it friends you talk to, a book you read, meeting you attend.
- Upscale, It’s not the strongest who stays, but those who are able to adapt. That’s a quote from Charles Darwin. Improve your skill is a must, plus knowing what to prioritize to learn.
- To explore, what I mean there are places, personalities, foods, cultures. The experience to try new things is a journey for humility. Knowing that we have lots of awesomeness outside our circle.
- Be efficient, I consumed a lot of content related to minimalism. Which means, you should fight to excessive possession. Mostly about material stuff such as fashion, collectibles, electronics. It works for me, as it adds time to think/spend in something more productive.
And absolutely saying yes for social pressure isn’t something that matters, at least for me. And it’s still open for changes, as what matters can be as dynamic as that.
Anyway, thanks for reading this. Hope it helps you to discover what matters for you ☺
#whatmatters
